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All you need to ask yourself before you become a mother

I thought I was. And that I had this sorted, but nothing prepared me for the miracle, the joy, the tears and the smiles. Truth be told, I had no idea what to expect let alone how much my life was going to change once my baby came into this world.

Motherhood is the most underrated game changer in life. It shows you all your strengths and vulnerabilities, and it makes you the better for it.

At first, the feeling was rather overwhelming, there was this little life to protect and care for.

The very vulnerability of my baby, her fragility and her dependence on me for everything, was, in itself, exhilarating.

Of course, with responsibility came accountability. Suddenly everyone around me had an opinion and kept giving me pointers on how I should raise my child. It definitely made me question myself, was I not fit enough to be a good mother? Was I even ready to be a mom?

It's perfectly normal and fine to experience emotions that are beyond one's control and have nothing to do with PMS or hormonal issues! Photo: Representational

While nothing prepares you for this change, modern women like I have much to be thankful for in terms of support systems, literature about raising a child and help.

Speaking from experience I can say that young mothers everywhere should be prepared. It's a series of questions and the answers definitely don't fall in a chronological order.

To begin with, pregnancy is a beautiful thing on its own. It's a new beginning and can make you feel wonderful. As an expecting mother, always look after yourself, your health and nutrition is priority, because if you're doing well, the baby will be doing great.

Start working on the smaller details, because once the baby is born, you may think time is prime, but it just ceases to exist! You'll never have plenty of time again and it may be a while before things fall into place.

So, before this happens, ensure you get the nursery, diapers, baby-proofing and a whole lot of other things in order. It helps to have help. And it's also important to create some space for yourself. You are going to have to fit that in.

As women, we can feel pressured into doing things, even made to believe that once we are married, the right thing to do is to have a baby. Don't give in to others' opinion.

This is the longest and most unique relationship of your life, and you will never be prepared enough or knowledgeable enough. Babies don't come with an instruction manual, and thank god for it. The best way you can really prepare yourself is to look deep within and find answers to the most relevant questions.

Are you emotionally ready for such a responsibility?

From the get-go, we're programmed to have maternal instincts and god forbid if we're not interested, because self-doubt and reservations may mean there is something fundamentally wrong with us!

No. It's perfectly normal and fine to experience emotions that are beyond one's control and have nothing to do with PMS or hormonal issues!

While most parents plan their pregnancies, there are few surprise ones too!

Honestly, if you're ready, it's a beautiful ride, and if you're not, then it's time you jumped on that train, because it's a ride all right, but how you choose to drive is your call.

So, make it a fun one and don't let exasperation get the better of you. Because what lies ahead (and I won't lie) some of it may not be fun, but the entire experience is totally worth it!

In the end, happiness is a good word that sums up the event. Lets just call it an event, cause at times you may feel like an outsider - stunned, watching your life go by, smiling and saying, I can't believe I made this happen!

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